The Nouveau Riche and Their Poor Pals

The Nouveau Riche and Their Poor Pals
                         By Oghene Omonisa

Some people are damn lucky – they are born into riches and have never known poverty. If not into the Aliko Dangote or Mike Adenuga kind of wealth, but at least, by internationally accepted standard, they grew up in wealth. They attended the best private schools here in Nigeria, or the elitist federal government colleges. Or even did their secondary schooling in Europe or America. They had their holidays in the best vacation resorts all over the world. Then, after secondary school, they had their university education overseas or some elite private university here. They were and still are privileged.
Most, if not all of their childhood pals were all of the privileged class. They socialised together, dated one another and ended up marrying themselves. They had and still have little contact with members of the lower class, most of who are only members of their domestic staff or employees of the lower cadre of their companies. They ride high and seldom stoop low. They deserve it because they are privileged. Indeed, they are lucky!

But what they do not realise is that they are twice lucky. They are lucky to be rich and luckier to be born into it. Not like their counterparts who are equally well off but who rode through the roughshod of poverty to arrive where they are. Not like the poor guys who had known poverty

from birth; guys whose parents were poor, guys whose childhood pals were poor and whose neighbours were poor. But now, they have arrived. They have recently made it big. They are the nouveau riche!
A nouveau riche guy just cannot help living life to its fullest. He sure had dreamt and worked hard for his new good life. He jets off to the best vacation spots worldwide, possesses large bank accounts, super home, luxury cars, made many equally rich people for pals and has many fast-fading old poor pals. That is where the nouveau riche guy is unlucky: how to relate with his old poor pals without appearing snooty, and its implications.
The nouveau riche guy and complaining pals is a common feature in our society, especially among young married guys or young single male adults, who still have pals trying to find their feet or those just getting along with the average life. It is often heard of an old poor buddy of a nouveau riche guy grumbling about his now-wealthy pal who does not spare him a ‘Hi’ call any longer and invites him over for a visit or a get-together no more. He complains that his pal is now arrogant.

But, most often than not, the nouveau riche guy is not arrogant. He has risen in social class. He has made rich pals. His new status has to reflect in whom he socialises with. Often times, he is not comfortable with his poor old pals because now, his ways of reasoning have changed. And unfortunately, most poor blokes are in the habit of either pestering their nouveau riche pals for alms or pouring every of their personal problem on them. Having such pals around turns out to be irritating to the nouveau riche guy because whenever he spends money, the poor pal sees him as extravagant, and considers the pressing problems he could solve with such money, as if the nouveau riche guy should no longer live the kind of life he deserves.So, the newly-made guy just draws a wide margin between him and such pals. Of course, there are a few poor old pals the nouveau riche guy can tolerate because of the poor pals’ exposure or carriage or educational status, seeing very high possibility that those ones could join him soon. But there are some others he does not wish to run into, as it will be embarrassing to receive a wave from them.

When it comes to this stage, a nouveau riche guy realises some old pals are complaining. Only few nouveau riche guys are capable of managing such a situation by keeping in touch and making contact when necessary, perhaps calling or dropping by to felicitate over a happy situation or to sympathise over a sad one; and any old poor pal who expects him to continue to hang out with him like before, is only having pipedream. Class distinction is a social reality. And material success and/or education define class. Only the ignorant will assume otherwise. The knowledgeable will understand.
But some nouveau riche guys who cannot manage the situation will begin to experience what could be termed ‘sad wish’: a desire by such nouveau riche guys not to see a poor old pal who they realise sees them as arrogant, to climb up to their level. This is because if the poor old pal climbs to their level, especially if they are in related fields, where they might get to relate often, there could be a cold war: wordless rivalry. Even some nouveau riche folks will outrightly avoid a new nouveau riche pal to save themselves from a revenge shining.
There is the story of a young bright engineering graduate who secured a well-paying job immediately after graduation. And his status suddenly changed, especially his class of friends. When he got married, he deliberately sidelined all his old friends, including his closest schoolmate, who was also an engineering graduate but who made second-class lower. When the poor pal got married and invited him, the nouveau riche guy deliberately turned it down. But the poor pal would later secure a lucrative job with an American oil firm, from a state civil service job he was patching up with. He was first sent to the home company for training.
When the snobbish nouveau riche guy heard his old pal had travelled overseas, he sneered that he would not be surprised if the guy was jailed for dealing in illicit drugs, for fraud or other related crimes desperate immigrants are known for over there, thinking the newly-employed pal had gone there to ‘hustle’. When he was informed that the guy had just secured a good job and was sent abroad for training, the snob was agitated, saying it was impossible, wondering what contact the guy had to secure such job with his class of degree.
With close observation, it is easy to realise that a rich guy who was born rich easily accepts a nouveau riche guy into his social circle than a nouveau riche guy accepting a new nouveau riche guy.
Hello! Are you a nouveau riche guy? Com’on, give that old but average or struggling pal a once-once call, if only to let him know you are aware he is out there getting along or coming behind. Or are you some poor guy who is working for the top? Well, just try to understand that your nouveau riche buddy is now of a higher class. Level don change. It is acceptable if he could keep in touch once in a while. That is one of the best forms of friendship that pals from such varied classes could maintain.
And when a poor pal eventually gets to the top, it sure will be decent of him to save cheering and encouraging smiles for other old pals who are yet to make it. Or what do you think?